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#TrumpDay – Planet Moonbat Edition

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

If You Want to Troll Me, You Will Have to Pay

There must be some sort of central command for these people.
Perhaps they are sent from Obama's taxpayer funded Internet Propaganda Czar, Jesse Lee (whose annual salary is $72,000)? What else could explain the multiple appearances of commenters to this blog who each day post an identical leftist talking point meme repeatedly under various user names and with different IP addresses? Each day it is a different theme copy/pasted in the threads here, and each day the spam trolls whine that their repeated off-topic irrelevant screeds get removed.

They must have missed the previous explanations I have given here about what is and is not tolerated in my comments section. Consider this a refresher:
Any troll who shows up where I have my stuff will be abused and cursed out thoroughly by myself and anyone else who wishes to do so until they either go away or I get bored and ban them. Under no circumstances shall we attempt to reason with them because they are by nature, unreasonable and not worth the effort. Trolls are however, fully deserving of whatever vitriol and verbal abuse I and/or any of my readers feel like dishing out. (January 15, 2011)
The spam trolls who have been appearing lately are boring, so they do not last very long here.
Then there are the argumentative trolls, who are less boring than the spam copy/paste trolls but a nuisance nonetheless, this is for them:
I have a standard policy of removing obvious trolls unless my readers are having fun abusing them, but when people who I know turn up, I pretty much let them say whatever they please. However, if you show up in the comments section and are nasty to everybody, I don't care who you are, the people you harass are more than welcome to hand your ass to you in as ,many broken pieces as they see fit. I don't care. Especially if the people you are picking fights with happen to agree with me.
MY BLOG, not yours.

I'm a big fan of Wirecutter's blog, Knuckledraggin my life away and he has a comment policy that I really can identify with. Here's a portion of it:
This blog is not a forum. I have my views and I ain't changing them.
Read that again. This blog is not a forum. I'm not interested in your fucking arguments and you damned sure ain't going to change my mind with a comment.
It doesn't cost any money to start a blog and tons of people already have them. If you find my posts so upsetting to you that you feel the need to fill my comments section with disparaging comments and argue with everyone who posts in support of the opinions expressed at my blog, then why don't you go and blog about it? Instead of having a flame war with my readers, have a blog war with me. Observe Stacy McCain's Rule 4 and it will drive traffic to both of our blogs and also you won't have to worry about the natives who I let have free reign in my comments section here. You can moderate comments at your own blog so my big ole meanie-pants readers can't hurt you. (April 13, 2011
Now although I have no qualms about removing the jackanapes, I do understand that it must be frustrating for them to come all the way over here and spam/troll my threads only to see their efforts disappear, so I will be kind and make them an offer:
If you wish to have your annoying comments not be removed from this blog, you can buy a subscription that will give you troll privileges here. Use the Troll Permission Subscription button to purchase troll privileges here and I will stop removing your comments for the length of time that you buy. Tell me your DISQUS profile name, and give me your email and IP address and I will whitelist you as an accepted designated troll so you can gleefully paste the lefty meme that your prog masters issue to you daily without it being removed (for the duration of time that you paid for). Since you all always post the same exact copy/paste of your daily meme, if my price is too steep, you trolls can all pool together and buy a subscription for one of you. That is the ONLY way you will ever be permitted to post your garbage here, if I am not being paid, I am under no obligation to humor you. If you don't like it, go cry to your commie pinko rat bastard douche bag jackass pals and then go to hell.


Subscription prices to be whitelisted as an accepted troll
Username to be Whitelisted





This post is linked at 1389 Blog. Thank you! 

This post is linked at The Pulp Ark Journal. Thanks, Pulp! 

This post is linked at The Other McCain. Thank you, Wombat-socho! 

This post is linked at The Camp Of The Saints. Thanks, Bob!






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63 comments:

BlueJeansandLace said...

*snicker* Pretty generous offer.... And I'm not sure how any troll could mistake your rules. 

SignPainterGuy said...

Hello, is anyone home ? I`m looking for my friend Zilla of the Resistance ! I clicked on her "favorites" link, but I seem to have found The Onion instead !

Zilla of the Resistance said...

I think so! My patience is very valuable, so they will really be getting quite a bargain!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Nope, it's me! The trolls keep coming, so I figure why not implement a Troll Management Program for Capitalist Bloggers? My time and my patience are very valuable to me, so if they want to keep pasting their off-topic irrelevant leftist talking points in my comment threads, and if they don't want me to remove them, then they will have to pay. I am under no obligation to humor people who are of no value to me, trolls have no "rights" here unless they purchase them. If they pay, they may stay.
I can't believe this hasn't been thought of sooner!

WebSpinner said...

This is an awesome idea, Zilla!  Any takers so far?

Zilla of the Resistance said...

 None yet, but the night is young! :)

1389 said...

These trolls are trying to hijack the audience you have earned through your own hard work. The way to build an audience is by putting up worthwhile material, year after year. These trolls won't do that, so you may as well bill them for ad space!

Linked here: http://1389blog.com/2011/08/04/zillas-troll-management-program-for-capitalist-bloggers/

Zilla of the Resistance said...

That's the way I see it! Thanks for linking me up, 1389! 

palintologist said...

Pffft.  George Soreass prob'ly lights his fireplace with fitties.  He can easily fling them up in the air for his sad-arse troll army to grovel over.

quite_rightly said...

I love it!

Hardnox said...

Interesting concept...  "Pay to Troll".  It has a nice ring to it.

Jack Puglis said...

Brilliant, Zilla! You and at least one person who posted alluded to an organized effort to interfere with conservative writing.
 
I've learned of several other conservative bloggers who are experiencing what you are – extremist liberal trolls who appear organized; repeated memes; a similar writing style; and a pattern of systematic, deliberate interference.
 
This anti-conservative nastiness extends beyond the bloggers.  If you look up the reviews of any conservative books on Amazon, you will find the same thing happening: hate mongering from radical liberals who obviously have not read the book that they are reviewing.
 
The giveaway is that these reviews all have the same writing style – their phrasing, a methodology in their attacks, and similar ways of embedding false statements.  Since I am a lifelong student of the English language, I am always sensitive to the way that an individual writes.
 
However, the main giveaway in the Amazon reviews is the fact that they are clean, by which I mean that the writing is clear and free of grammatical, spelling and other errors.  Reviews from ordinary people tend to contain all of the common errors that busy people make when they do not edit their work.
 
This, more than anything else, tells me that someone has tasked either one person or a small group of people, likely controlled by an editor, to disrupt the Amazon reviews.
 
This month’s (August, 2011) Townhall Magazine has a feature article on George Soros’ massive spending to control the mainstream media in America.  My jaw dropped when I read it.  Since fielding the kind of people that we are experiencing requires resources, I can only conclude that some well-funded agent is at work.  Occam’s Razor strikes again!

Peg Conroy said...

Ooh, $50 - I love it!  Mare, here is what I believe is happening.  You are getting more high profile attention from some of the bloggers who are movers and shakers on the right, so you have been handed to Troll Central Command to be dealt with daily.  There is not a doubt in my mind that there is an army (not necessarily a large one) of hate-spewing herd animal lefty troll assholes who are paid by the Beelzebama Regime, and likely the herd-dog John Podesta is in charge of them.  Remember, these tyrant- and dictator-loving scum claim to despise capitalism but THEY DO NOTHING FOR FREE as WE do!  They don't even take shits without being paid, basically.  All their buses and hotel rooms and signs where they make vile nuisances of themselves in public are paid for.  Sore-ass is a huge funder of this pestilence.  

I'll be interested to see if they actually pay for a whitelist sub.  LOLOL!!

These people are open, festering sores on the planet.  They need to be lanced, cauterized, and cut off and cut out.  They will be.  We are winning.  You have a horde of pukey trolls spewing on you - you've made it, baby!!  :-))I love the smell of burning trolls in the morning...

mRed said...

Do I smell little Billy? Or maybe Ellen. Oh, it's Jim or Thad or Anon or Guest. More than just being trolls they plagiarize the same meme on every conceivable site to try to drive their message. Has anybody told the little bastards that Alinsky is dead.

Good idea Zilla. Of course they'll want a government grant to pay the fee.

Lola Lee Beno said...

I just looooove your policy! Way to go!

rosalie said...

A pay troll.  How original. Trolls are like parasites, so I doubt if you'll get any takers. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Yeah, but now there is a clearly stated policy for them to refer to when they wonder why their crap keeps disappearing. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Exactly, so if those trolls want to their posts to not be eliminated here, they can pay for the privilege. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Feel free to implement your own version of the plan if the need should ever arise!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thank you. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Pamela Geller has a new book coming out (which I have pre-ordered) and although it has not yet even been released, the lunatic Charles Johnson and his Libelous Ghoul Fucktards have been swarming Pam's Amazon listing and adding all kinds of disgusting and horrible tags to her book (that nobody has read yet) to sabotage sales. There is no level too low for those cretins to sink to. They are mentally challenged and morally crippled. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

$50 is just the rate for one day troll privileges, check the drop down menu, I offer a whole range of options! The best value of course is to purchase a one year troll subscription, for only $9,999.00!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

I'm sure Obama will be happy to give it to them. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks, Lola!

Chris Wysocki said...

Zilla starts a new blog - The Troll Booth!

Stop! Pay, Troll!

If I ever get off my lazy butt and write a comments policy I am so snarfing this.

sablegsd said...

Ingenious! 

B10444671 said...

Like

Zilla of the Resistance said...

You should (giving me proper linky love, of course), because it WORKS! Not a single troll has posted since I made my offer, whereas I had been deluged with them even hours before I made the above post!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks! I wish I'd thought of it sooner, because it is working! This blog has been troll free since I published the above post!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Glad you like it.

mRed said...

Zilla - You scared up a hornet's nest. Little Billy Yelverton is having a hissy fit about it in my comments where he calls you all sorts of names. What a little man.

Zilla of the Resistance said...

I don't understand why they think I should allow them to abuse me on my own private property. They do not have permission to spew their hatred here, but if they want to be seen by my audience so badly, they can do so by paying the Troll Toll.

Thom Paine said...

I love it! Give 'em hell MJ!

Thom Paine said...

The only reason the trolls are spamming here is to try and keep you too busy to have the time to speak the truth as you do here. I love your "troll toll" policy! I have been lucky so far and have had no trolls visiting my blog, but if they ever do I will be quick to institute the MJ Troll Toll! You are an inspiration!
Keep it up!
Thom Paine - the Independent Realist

Linda said...

Okay, I'm late to the party.  But yes.  I love this idea.  Pay to Troll.

If you get any takers, you'll knock me over with a feather.

I very rarely get trolls, which is probably a reflection of how rarely my blog is read.  HA.

But one thing I enjoy is a little troll spotting, so from time to time do feel free to post snippets of the latest troll meme that seems to be a "cut and paste" type job.  They can be fun to google search and find a real live person connected with it.

best
Linda

Mike said...

 Nice...great idea. I don't have a troll problem, I have a spam problem, but since I can moderate them, it's not that big a deal.

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Charge 'em, make 'em pay to advertise on your blog! because that's what non-troll spammers are doing, they are using your audience to advertise their crap!

________________________________

Wombat_socho said...

I find your ideas fascinating and would like to subscribe to your newsletter. ;)

Seriously, though, this is the best idea for handling trolls since our commenters asked if they could hold an auction to get one of our more persistent (and spacy) trolls banned.

Zilla of the Resistance said...

I try my best! :)

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks, Linda, no takers yet, but they are howling like wounded hyenas  all over other people's comment sections over the fact that I don't let them play here.

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks, Wombat! I will happily email you when I have new posts, free if charge! ;)
I'm glad you like my idea, feel free to share it wherever you like! It is very nice to see you here at my place, I am honored by your presence.

SignPainterGuy said...

Boo hoo ! I went over to her house to play and she ran me off and kept my ball ! Oh, boo hoo !

MJ, you are so wonderfully mean ! ;-)

Bob Belvedere said...

Bravo!

Innovative.  Entrepreneurial.  Uniquely American. 

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks, Thom!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

They can have their ball back when they go chase it onto the busy 4 lane highway that I'll throw it in the middle of!

Zilla of the Resistance said...

Thanks, Bob! It's the Troll Management System for Capitalist Bloggers!  (Which probably would have ben a better title for this post - I am really bad at titles.)

ThePaganTemple said...

I just delete their comments. I don't mind somebody disagreeing with me, as long as they are respectful of the fact they are on my blog. But when they spew obvious lies and spin I don't stand for it. I had one guy try to tell me Obama has reduced unemployment and the deficit and saved jobs, etc. Stuff like that is just too ridiculous to allow to remain, let alone take the time to dispute. I have another clown who drops by on a fairly regular basis to call me names and who has even threatened my life. I delete his comments now and will continue to do so even if he's reasonable. I just don't put up with the crap anymore.

Zilla of the Resistance said...

I'll let them post, if they pay for the privilege. I built this audience, they didn't, why should they be allowed to use my platform to proselytize for free?  Fuckum. Make 'em pay.

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